From the Mouths of Babes....


Thing 1 is a funny little guy and throws me a real zinger occasionally. This past weekend I took the Things to go swimming and there were alot of bees flying around. Since Thing 1 is genuinely afraid of his own shadow...he was a little edgy. Now I've known timid kids, but this one will literally bolt out of his chair in the dining room when the ice drops in the freezer! He'll just be walking around and will suddenly WHIP around and shout "WHAT WAS THAT???" Probably his shadow he saw out of the corner of his eye. So, a predatory bee was just enough to send him over the edge. I'm trying to reason with him and it was about effective as trying to reason with a drunk person. Finally, I explain to him that the bees are not going to bother him. They are just sugar bees...that's why they keep landing on his Sprite cup. They're just looking for something sweet. So, they're not going to bother you, you're not sweet. Thing 1 turns around and looks at me with an astonished look on his face. He says in a sickenly sweet voice...."Well, I'm a very, very nice boy!". After regaining my composure I tell him, yes baby, yes you are, but you don't taste sweet. That's what mommy meant. "Okay, but I'm very, very sweet". Yes baby, yes you are!

This is the same Thing that informed me when he was four that he wasn't going to college. I explained that he had to go to college so he could learn how to be whatever it was he decided he wanted to be when he grew up. He looked at me incredulously and said, "HELLOOOOO, I'm going to be a Super Hero! Super Heros have super brains, so they don't need to go to college. Humoring him, I said that Super Heros work for free. They just like to help people. How are you going to pay for your house and support your family? Without skipping a beat he said, "I'm going to have Santa's Elves make super action figures of me when they're done making all the toys for Santa. Then I'm going to sell them for $3.00 each....and since the elves work for free, I'll get to keep all the money. I looked across the living room at hubs and exclaimed....he's going to run an empire one day. He's four and already he understands the concept of profit. Now days he doesn't really care what it is he's going to do as long as he's the boss. He also has control issues.....Thing 2 will definitely vouch for me on that one.